What BoF Characters Would Never Say

[jgkitarel]

Ryu4: There is no way in Hell I'm joining with that efette, old english speaking, has been of an emperor.

Nina4: Umm, Ryu, I need to ask you something.
Ryu4: Yes?
Nina4: (blushes) Well, um, I always wanted to ask you. Boxers or Briefs?
Ryu4: (facefaults)
Cray: That had to hurt.
Ryu4: (recovered) Boxers, natually. Briefs are always too tight.
Nina4: (blushes) Well, you are hung like a dragon.
Cray: (jealous) Oh, REALLY?! (Pulls down pants) ((no we don't see anything))
Prove it snake boy. I hope you measure up.
Ryu4: Sure. (pulls down pants)
Cray: ... uh...
Everyone else but Nina4: daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
Nina4:Ursula, you can have Cray or Scias, but I have Ryu.
Ursula: (bugeyed) ...Sure, no problem...
Scias: I a-a-am glad I-i-i-i am h-h-hap-p-p-py with what I h-h-have.
Nina sneaks up behind Ryu and clubs him over the head.
Nina4: If you all will excuse us.

[Ryu3000]

Bleu: I'm not that tired.
Ryu: Ladon drools, Tyr rules!

[Erinyes]

Ryu: (anything)

Duh! He's MUTE!

[Rachridgeback]

Let us revive this thread! And with Dress to Kill references, too!

Nina2: Shooting clay pigeons, I think, yeah, go for that. Shooting clay, clay pigeons are f**kers! Come 'round your house, whiz through, "fwhooo, fwhooo, fwhooo!" They do nothing... they don't even eat... flies!

---

Ryu5: *working*

Nina5: *thinks* Ah, Ryu... I saw you in the room, and the (proverbial) sun came from behind the (proverbial) clouds and a shaft of sunlight caught your hair, golden, framing your face! Your eyes burned red hot fire into my soul! And frankly, I fancy you!

Ryu5: Hey, Nina! How's it going?

Nina5: *panicking* Hey, Ryu! I saw you in the room! Hmm... oh, I have legs! Do you have legs? Oh yeah, oh yeah, there they are... do you like bread? Look, I've got French loaf right here! Yeah, French loaf! *Pulls loaf of bread from her pocket and gives it to Ryu* Bye!! *Runs off in the opposite direction* I love you!

[Mr. Worent]

cupid: All I need is the surgery and I'm all set. Goodbye Cupid, hello Cupida!!
----
Vexacion: I love you, son.
Bosch: You, too, dad.
----
Nina5: Umm, I think there's been a mistake. This must be Ryu's script cuz all it has is moaning.
Ryu5 whispers to Lin: Should I tell her she's a horrible actress?
Nina5: Rediculous!! I'll have you know I could've turned this role down for MEAN GIRLS!!

[Gizmonicgamer]

Peco:Gigity gigity gigity! Lets have sex!

Ryu: Anything. He doesn't talk.

Momo: I fear change.

Fou-lu: ITS RAININ' SIDEWAYS!

Ershin: I am Alphonse. Alphonse is me. Think about it.

Rei: That doesn't beat all. Not even close, bitches.

Ershin: I... Im pregnant.

Ursula: I am Ursula, the Gunsmith alchemist. A dog of the military.

[Mr. Worent]

Mina: Nina, no!! That's chicken!!
Nina: ....*gulp*....
----
Katt: I just LOVE my fur coat. my TIGER skin coat.

[jgkitarel]

Katt: Like, peace and love man. ^_^

Sten: I have been a naughty monkey, SPANK ME BABY!

Nina1: (in dominatrix gear): Call me QUEEN! <crack!>
Ryu1: (eyeing Nina1) Yes Mistress!!!

Nina4: Ryu, I have something to tell you. Umm, well, you see... I'm pregnant.

[Rachridgeback]

The following is inspired by something I saw on AnimeSuki. In which the BoF gang plays some random game.

Bo: You can't shoot that target, Karn. It's like 500 yards away and the size of a sparrow. You're so ridiculous. Hey, Ryu, Karn is so ridiculous.

Ryu: Hm? Oh, yeah, ridiculous. *Quickly stuffs paper he was reading into pocket*

Bo: What was that?

Ryu: ...Nothing.

Bo: Weren't those your character sheets? Hey, that reminds me, did you ever check on what that sword you have has on it?

Ryu: Yeah, I checked, and I was right. It's a +15 Vorpal Greatsword that bypasses all damage reduction and is never destroyed, ever, and kills anything in one shot, just like the DM said when we got it.

Karn: That's really funny, because I distinctly remember when we got it, the DM was all like "You find an obsidian greatsword without an aura"...

Ryu: *thinks* No, that isn't what... No...

Karn: ...And then we even checked and it wasn't magical at all.

Ryu: No, it was magical. If you'll remember, when she was setting up the next dungeon Nina asked me if I wanted to buy any gear from town, and I said no, but the reason I said that was...

Deis: Bullcrap. That never happened, because after we did the Caverns of Raugnarroth, we had to go straight the the Eternal Tower of Drakyruumsh, because the evil wizard Thauross had the Crystal of Decimating Glares, and...

Nina: Shut up, Deis, you're not even in the area.

Deis: What the hell? Yes I am! They said they were heading out into the canyon, and I said that I followed them.

Nina: No, I have it right here. You were using your Craft (Leatherworking) to make that armour you needed after the Bebilith in the last dungeon stripped off your armour, and were therefore too busy to go into the canyon with them.

Deis: No! I stopped working on the armour when I followed them!

Nina: You never actually said that you stopped working on the armour, so...

Deis: It's implied, goddamn it! What, do I now have to say every little freaking detail?! If I say I go into the canyon, then I obviously put down the leather armour. But it doesn't matter. I go into the canyon. There. Done.

Nina: No, I can't let you go into the canyon, because with your Rogue skill set you'll probably see the twoscore orc raiders hiding in the bushes!

Bo: Wait... What?

Karn: Huh?

Nina: Whatever! OK, back in character.

Karn: Anyway, I can too hit that target.

*Karn fires his pistol, hitting the target perfectly from over 500 yards away*

Bo: Holy crap...

Ryu: Good Ladon, nice shot. Yes! I got away with it!

Deis: How the hell does that work? It's a freaking pistol. That would have been a hard shot with a sniper rifle.

Karn: You forget, we're not playing BoF right now. The pistol is broken crap in this game.

Nina: He's right, you know. People can kill players in Scorpions from the cliffs at the side of Blood Gultch with the pistol in this game.

Gobi: That's stupid. It needs a nerf.

Karn: You need a nerf, you Zenny whore.

Gobi: STFU. You never even have to reload, you hacker.

Karn: You never NEED to reload, and all you have to do is lock onto someone, hit the trigger and bam! They're dead. Stop being a spear-whore, asshole.

Deis: Kick him from the server.

Nina: No.

Karn: ROFL. I win.

Bo: This server is whack.

[Bo Gilliam]

Won-Qu sings:

What can i do for you
What can i do for you (yeah, heh)
What can i do for you (alright)
What can i do for you
I can hear you
What can i do for you (oh ohh)
What can i do for you (ooh baby)
What can i do for you

Ano hi kokoro no kanata ni egaiteta basho ni iru
Tohou ni kuretetari suru keredo mou modorenai

Yume ni mita katachi to wa
Nanimokamo ga chigau
Genjitsu ni wa... memai sae suru

Tiaru na sekai ni yureteru kanjyou
Maketakunai
Mou tada hashiru shikanai kono mune ni
Kikoetekuru
Kimi wa hitori jyanai

What can I do for you
What can I do for you
What can I do for you
I can hear you
What can I do for you
What can I do for you
What can I do for you

Kesshite furimuki wa shinai anata ni wa toyoranai
Nanika ga areba kanarazu suguni kite kureru kara

Ima boku ni dekiru koto
Sore wa shinjiru koto...
Shinjitsu nara kono mune ni aru

Riaru na sekai ni yureteru kanjyou
Sasaeru no wa
Sou anata ga oshietekureta subete
Ima no watashi
Daraka, hitori jyanai

What can I do for you
What can I do for you

What can I do for you
What can I do for you
What what what
What can I do for you
What can I do for you

I can hear you

Riaru na sekai ni yureteru kanjyou
Kanjitemo
Anata ga me o tojita nara soko ni iru
Kizuna ga aru
D akara, hitori jyanai

Riaru na sekai ni yureteru kanjyou
Maketakunai
Mou tada hashiru shikanai kono mune ni
Kikoete kuru
Kimi wa hitori jyanai

What can i do for you (yeah, heh)
What can i do for you (alright)
What can i do for you
I can hear you
What can i do for you (oh ohh)
What can i do for you (ooh baby)
What can i do for you (yeah, heh)

I can hear you

I can hear you!

Won-Qu bows to the crowd and leaves the stage.

[DragonArchangel]

Ryu(any)(thinking):Should I say something now?

Nina3(crying and holding KO'ed Ryu3):Ryu please talk to me,please Ryu,please talk to me,anything,but please say something...(moment of silence)...nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Peco:BURN THAT DAMN FOREST!!!!!

Spar and Bo:Yes, sir!!!!

Garr:Let's see z+729y(375x477653210/1985)- 0 =5wx + oxp- 0 + 98746/25

Momo:WOW!!Garr,you're soooo smart!!!I wish I could be just like you!!!!

Deis:We don't need magic,look at my muscles

[Wilren]

Barubary, BoF2: I love you, you love me....

Momo: Ugh! Stupid computer! I HATE this thing!
(Sidenote: Were she to deal with a Windows 2000 computer for a few hours, this might actually happen....)

[Nina Windia ♦]

Barubary: you are the chosen one

Ryu: ........

Barubary: you will open god's gate

Ryu: .............

Barubary : you will talk

All: *LOL*

Barubary: well, you can't win them all...

[Ria]

Without making everyone scrool through the whole song, I merely suggest everyone imagine Fou Lu performing a spirited rendition of "I Just Can't Do It Alone" from Chicago.

[DragonArchangel]

Nina:hey Ryu...why do you never say something?

Ryu: because I'm mute

Nina: oh,okay then...